Once more onto the breach with ideas that are deranged enough to have come from the mind that gave us 50 killer shark and killer snake movies of the past few years but without the pay or respect. Too many people automatically assume they're the reincarnation of Tennessee Williams or even think that they're superior to the screenwriters from Scary Movie 2. For some reason, you would think there could be a limit to the number of movie plots that could be developed by fusing multiple movies together with a cerebral Brundlefly teleporter. Sleep deprivation and a loose connection to reality are the only things needed to come up with these ideas.

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American PI

Jim is a mathematical genius and truly loves his mom's hot steaming apple pie. As he tries to develop a formula to calculate the probability of getting to third base on Prom night, his friends have wacky shenanigans. Stifler is accidentally caught when he tries re-enacting a gag from Porky's and must endure the wrath of Coach Beulah Ballbricker (Eugene Levy in drag). Jim becomes more frustrated by his lack of success with the Ursula, the busty Swedish exchange student. As the formulas and variables come easier to Jim, he starts to realize the profound equation is far more reaching than he ever imagined...

Class of Nuke 'Em High Plains Drifter

A mysterious cowboy wanders in Tromaville with his own score to settle. The radioactive waste has mutated the entire city of Tromaville is a challenge. As he takes care of the toughest of the tough, mutated honor roll, the Man with No Name sets his sights on the Tromavilla High Principal, Lloyd Kaufmann. With revenge being the prize that only a high enough body count can win, he cuts through each of the opponents by playing them against each other as he gets closer to the last target.

Purple Reign of Fire

The world has been falling farther and farther into a nightmarish realm since dragons have started attacking people around the world. The world does have some heroes left. The Artist Formerly Known as Prince or as a Strange Symbol has discovered he can wield his funky shaped guitar to slay dragons. He is joined by shaven-headed Chris Kattan leading a small band of commands in commando missions against the dragons. Can these heroes unite for one mission that will free the world without killing each other first? The soundtrack will of course include the future classic songs "When Dragons Fry" and "Dragon Nikki."

Rhinestone Zombie

A famous singer (Jessica Simpson) makes a bet with her manager that she can train anyone to be a successful country singer to break her contract. However, when the unscrupulous manager (Steve Buscemi) raises a down on his luck cabbie (Vin Diesel) from the dead to become a zombie for his nefarious choice, can she train this zombie to sing, curb his inhuman bloodlust, and fall in love with him all at the same time?