Faces of Schlock (2009) – By Brian Morton

I recently loaned a bunch of my movies to a friend. And, surprisingly, they returned them all, telling me that there was no way they’d finish the pile, as the first movie they watched was too "schlocky"! Well, I was a bit hurt, after all, aren’t great ‘b’ movies supposed to have an element of schlock to them? Even big budget mainstream movies have schlock elements in them, let’s all take a look at Arnold and Bruce Willis in The Expendables and then explain to me how that isn’t schlocky! Well, a new DVD from Henrique Couto, Andrew Shearer, Chris LaMartina and Justin Channell, called Faces of Schlock, delivers the schlock and does it with a huge amount of pride! Now, these are filmmakers I can get behind!

Faces of Schlock is a classic anthology movie, featuring 4 short films, framed by a horror host, Slutpira. The first movie in line is Blood Witch, the story of a ‘goth chick’ who calls forth a long dead witch who is now forced to kill anyone who she is commanded to! And, our ‘goth chick’ hero has a list of people she wants rid of! Next is Mike Wuz Here, a very cool story about a movie theater and its ghostly employee! Then is One Foot In The Grave, the story of an old witch who seeks immortality and the only ingredient she needs is the foot of a virgin. Finally, comes Slay Ride, which finds an obnoxious teen stalked by a vicious killer on Christmas Eve!

Each of these shorts is amazing in it’s own right, but the two that really stand out are Mike Wuz Here and One Foot In The Grave, Grave manages to be both scary and amusing, bringing some fun to the horror, while Mike brings a bit of horror to the fun! Each of these writer/directors is talented and, I’m willing to bet, bound for great things! I’m giving Faces of Schlock 4 out of 4 cigars, if you’re a fan of the ‘b’ movie or drive-in fare or even just plain old indie horror, then Faces of Schlock is a great ride! Pull the curtains, dim the lights and head over to http://www.alternativecinema.com and get a copy for yourself!