Harpoon: Whale Watching Massacre (2010) – By Brian Morton

Nature is a pretty amazing thing when you think about it. It must be why things like nature hikes, mountain climbing and whale watching are such a lucrative business. Well, whale watching is lucrative unless your job was whale hunter, then it might have affected you in a more negative way. Well, the new movie, Harpoon: Whale Watching Massacre, takes a look at what might happen to whalers who didn’t fare as well as some others.

It all takes place in Sweden, a place that was once a home of whalers, but has now stopped whaling and turned to the more peaceful pursuit of whale watching tourism. An international group of people have booked passage to spend a peaceful day watching these magnificent animals in their natural habitat…well, that’s the idea anyway. When the captain of the boat is accidentally killed, the passengers use the radio to call for help, but it’s not help that comes for them, it’s a family of whalers who have been put out of work and are looking from something new to hunt! The group is taken aboard an old whaling vessel and are hunted one at a time, until there’s only a couple left alive.

Harpoon: Whale Watching Massacre has the potential to be a ‘Texas Chainsaw At Sea’ kind of movie, but it never really lives up to that potential. There’s never really any confusion as to the intentions of the ‘evil whaling family’, the victims are really cookie cutter characters and the twists that are here never give this movie the tension or scares that it needs. The only really interesting thing in the whole movie is the ending, which gives us a bit of ambiguity, but nothing that will have you wondering what happens next.

I’m giving Harpoon: Whale Watching Massacre 2 out of 4 cigars, it’s a movie that could be a lot more than it is, and might have actually been the start of something really good, but just turns out to be a mindless slasher movie set in a boat. You can check it out for yourself by heading over to http://www.image-entertainment.com.