How to Survive Halloween Night – By Alexandra Bradley

As you read this, the leaves are starting to turn, the air is cooling, and Halloween night is steadily approaching. If one is not careful then they may find themselves meeting an untimely end on this ghoulish night. However, if you follow this “How To” survival guide, based off the mother of all Halloween movies, John Carpenter’s Halloween, then you will return home unscathed and just in time to eat some candy.

1. Don’t have sex on Halloween night if your little brother has come home from trick-or-treating.

This proved to be a bad choice for Judith Meyers, as her little brother waited for her boyfriend to leave and stabbed his sister multiple times with a kitchen knife. Be especially aware if your little brother decides to be a clown for Halloween.

2. Don’t ignore a growling or barking dog…even if you are convinced it doesn’t like you in general.

There is a big difference between a dog growling at YOU and a dog growling in general. Dogs have a second sense especially for evil. If Annie were to have taken a clue from the dog, she would have locked the doors until the dog seemed to relax. She didn’t and both her and the dog suffered the consequences. This can be prevented.

3. Killers like to play mind games.

If windows slam open, doors suddenly close and lock, you receive multiple phone calls that only consist of heavy breathing, or something falls in the dark- it’s not your imagination or the wind. They will do this with everyone. If you experience this, leave the area you’re in as soon as possible.

4. Always listen to the creepy kid.

You may not do so on a regular basis, but make Halloween the exception. If he says he’s seen the boogeyman, make a mental note. It’s better to be duped than dead. Laurie makes such a mistake and it almost costs her, her life.

5. Don’t go anywhere alone.

Killers like to pick you off one by one. Going in groups has a higher survival rate. Annie, Bob, and Linda are all guilty of this and Laurie almost dies doing the same thing.

6. Killers don’t like teenagers to have fun.

Especially if fun involves enjoying illegal activities such as drugs (mostly smoking marijuana), smoking cigarettes, drinking alcohol, or having sex. So if you’re under 18…beware. Only straight edges like Laurie will make it through (we’ll let that one reefer slide).

7. Lights are your friends.

As far as we’ve come as inventors and human beings…when in a potentially dangerous situation, people seem to fail to notice a helpful little tool called a lamp. When in the dark and you flip the switch of a lamp…the room will suddenly becomes illuminated. This way you can see the blood tracks all over the plush carpeting and hightail it out of there. When Laurie went to check on her friends, three houses down, she did not turn on one lamp the entire time she was in the house, and ran straight into Michael.

8. Beware of bodies in groups.

If you find all your friend’s bodies in one space the chances are that the killer is still around the area. He’s just showcasing his handiwork before you become a part of his art show. Run and call the police from another house phone. Laurie, of course, sat in the room crying in disbelief making herself an easy target.

9. Always check twice, or three times, sometimes four…

After you’ve killed your killer…stab, shoot, etc, them a few more times. Save yourself the aggravation of being attacked multiple times…because they will conserve energy in attempt to kill you one last time. Laurie kept stabbing him and then running off to check on the children. She committed another faux pas by leaving a knife with the body several times. Always take your weapon with you. You never know when you’ll need it.

10. Don’t believe it till you see it.

If there is no body…they’re not dead. You can thank your lucky stars you’ve shot and stabbed at them enough times to chase them off but remember…next Halloween…they’ll be back for revenge.