Pieces (1982) – By Brian Morton

Do you remember Christopher George and Linda Day George? Well, if you do, then you might have watched a little too much TV in the 70s. The couple George were a staple of 70s TV. They often appeared on The Love Boat, Fantasy Island and other cookie cutter 70s shows. Well, I just found a movie with this Hollywood couple in it that’s almost worth watching…almost.

It’s called Pieces and the tagline says it all ‘you don’t have to go to Texas for a chainsaw massacre.”. Yep, that’s right, it’s pieces of people, girls specifically. Pieces is the story of a young boy who just wants to build a puzzle of a naked lady, but when his mother catches him and scolds him, he picks up an axe and chops her to…yep…pieces. I know, it’s a bit of an over-reaction, but hey, we all react in our own way.

Now, 40 years later, someone on a Boston college campus is killing co-eds and taking a piece of the body with them. This is part murder mystery, part slasher movie, and it’s all cheese! Christopher George is the rough around the edges detective and Linda is the rookie who goes undercover to catch the chainsaw wielding killer. In the meantime, we get to see several attractive co-eds, in various states of undress, chain sawed to..yep…pieces. It’s not the best movie I’ve ever seen, but it’s actually not the worst either.

Pieces is classic 80s horror, it’s a horror movie that wants to pretend that it’s something better than that, and for as hard as it tries, never lives up to either standard. The special effects in Pieces are solid and the story is pretty good, but if you can’t tell who the killer is after about ten minutes of the movie, then you my friend might be a little thick! It’s Pieces and it’s for the puzzle lover in all of us. So until next time when I’ll try building my own co-ed out of pieces of left over co-ed I have in the basement, remember, the best movies are bad movies.