The Maladjusted (2013) – By Cary Conley

Robbie, Carl, Ian, and Nikki have been friends for as long as any of them can remember. None of them are really doing anything with their lives and end up in the same old bar drinking the same old drinks and telling the same old jokes. Life for them is stale–at least for some of them. Ian (Michael Alban) is the ringleader. Happy-go-lucky and horny, he works as a bartender and spends his off-time in a bar. Ian plays pool, drinks beer, and enjoys nearly nightly company with one lady or another. As outgoing and confident as Ian is, Carl (Clayton Myers) is just the opposite. Though just as horny as Ian, he has no confidence, not much experience, and zero luck. Even his "hired dates" sometimes turn him down…or worse. Nikki (Rosebud Baker) is the only one of the four who has attempted marriage and it ended in disaster. She secretly wants a relationship with Carl, but he is totally clueless. Then there’s Robbie (George Katt). He’s unhappy with the way his life has played out so far. He’s about to hit 30 and has been trying to jump start his writing career to no avail. He has writer’s block and is scared that he is doomed to edit technical manuscripts for the rest of his life. Robbie is the occasional narrator of our story as he searches for the one thing he’s afraid he’s lost for good, and that is hope.

The guys all feel like they’re in a rut so Ian arranges a week’s vacation at a beach house through one of his seedy friends. But unbeknownst to the other guys, he’s also arranged for the house to be double-booked…with three lovely ladies. What could possibly go wrong?

The Maladjusted is a decidedly raunchy comedy mixed with a bit of drama towards the end. Along with Yon Zamolla (John C. Bailey), a middle-aged, pedophilic criminal that trades drugs and booze for underage parties and occasional statutory rape–and who happens to rent the house across the street–the six guys and gals party, insult, and sleep their way through several hilarious situations until Carl, who still can’t get any action, agrees to meet an Amazon woman and ends up being severely beaten by a cross-dressing crook. It’s at this point that things take a more serious turn as the guys go after the criminal. What will they do when they find the guy? Will the series of silly escapades be overshadowed by this violent episode?

Carl is the butt of many jokes within the film. In one funny bit Carl is overheard by the girls planning how he’s going to "bang them" only for one of them to yell down the stairs, "We can hear you!" Ouch! Some of the best comedy is reserved for John C. Bailey as the socially awkward loser trying to recreate the popularity in adulthood he so sorely lacked as a teenager. He’s a fast talking know-it-all, slightly greasy, and comes across like the world’s most annoying used car salesman. In one scene Robbie is about to get lucky with one of the gals in the outdoor hot tub when Yon walks onto the deck, turns on the light, and begins a conversation even though the girl is clearly topless. He’s sent away but comes back. Then comes back again. And even when he finally leaves, he’s still talking all the way across the yard and into the night. But the character of Yon is also sad and depressing and provides a nice balance to all the hilarity and debauchery going on. Even though he’s invited his reluctant friends to "the party of the year", he ends up at their door asking if they’ve seen all the kids. He can’t understand where all the kids have gone. Even in adulthood he’s getting stood up by all the cool kids. He’s providing the house, the drugs, and the beer and still can’t make any friends.

The single funniest scene in the film occurs near the end when Carl finally ends up in bed with a real, live woman. She asks him to talk dirty and as he struggles to find the right words, out of his mouth comes the most hilarious and shocking comment I’ve heard in a film in a long time. This scene and especially the girl’s reaction is worth the price of admission alone!

In the end, the fight with Carl and his fake hook-up end up spoiling the mood a bit, just as the girls were getting heated up. Robbie’s narration ties up all the loose ends in a final epilogue. Does his new relationship with the girl of his dreams continue? Is he finally able to complete that first novel? How about Carl–does he ever figure out that Nikki carries a torch for him? And what about Ian? Does he finally settle down or does he continue living a shallow life carousing every night for yet another conquest? You’ll have to watch this funny and highly entertaining adult comedy to find all these answers, but your time will be well-spent.

The Maladjusted has just been completed and hasn’t seen release just yet, but for more information you can check out the film’s IMDb page at or the film’s official site at