The Ninja Always Rings Once (2007) – By Duane L. Martin

The Ninja Always Rings Once is a comedy short film about an Italian guy who works for his father’s pizza restaraunt delivering pizzas and who also happens to have two obsessions in life –  Asian women and ninjas.

Unfortunately, he’s not the ladies man he likes to pretend he is, so his advances towards the Asian girls he delivers pizzas to are all rebuked, sometimes violently.  Basically, his life was kind of pathetic, until one fateful night.  A ninja kills a business man in an office building, and then is running away from some other ninjas that are trying to kill him.  He ducks down an alley and all is looking cool for him, when suddenly, a brick falls off the building, whacks him in the head and knocks him out.  Well naturally our heroic pizza boy is looking on in amazement and takes the ninja home with him, thereby saving his life.  The ninja is grateful, and seeing the boy’s obsession with ninjas, offers to train him in the ways of the ninja to repay him for saving his life.

After that it kinda turns into a buddy movie with the ninja training him, the kid being a doofus, and them eventually becoming buddies who both end up learning something about life from each other.

While this movie was cute and sometimes fun, I think my only real problem with it is that it wasn’t as fun as it could have been, and that left me feeling a little disappointed.  There was so much that could have been done with a film like this, and yet it never really seemed to climb out of the pit of mediocrity that it had placed itself in early on.  Technically the film was ok.  The pacing was pretty good, the camera work was fine, the sound was mostly ok but was walked on by the music now and then and sometimes it was a bit hard to hear some of the dialogue.  As for the acting, it was decent.  Nothing I’d write home about, but it wasn’t bad, and was at times even amusing.

This film had original songs in it that sounded like they came straight out of Trey Parker.  The guy who was singing them had mimicked Trey Parker’s singing and song style similar to the songs he did for Orgazmo and Baseketball.  I guess what bothered me about that is that when Trey does it it’s funny.  When someone else does it it’s like they’re just biting his style, so it kinda put me off.  The songs themselves weren’t bad, I just wish they had been more original style-wise.

I think this film would have benefited greatly from some more work on the script.  There was so much more fun stuff that could have been thrown in there, replacing some of the stuff that wasn’t all that fun.

I know it sounds like I didn’t like this movie, but that’s not the case.  It was on the good side of ok and did have some genuinely fun moments.  I really think though that more work on the script ahead of time and coming up with some better ideas for the stuff that happened in the film would have gone miles to making this the film I know it could have been.  If you get a chance to see this film, definitely do so.  It really isn’t a bad movie at all.  It just could have been better.

The website for this film is but at the time of this writing, it seems to be under construction.  Check back now and then to see when it’s up and you can find out more about this film whenever things are cool again on the site.